Because of Your Love I Live

I'm Still In Africa!!!

Wow....I am obviously the best blogger in the world. I cannot believe almost a month has passed since I last updated. It is flying by….like really flying. I think it is less than 80 days before I fly home. Crazy!

Ok where to start? The first couple weeks here in the city were really hard. It was a constant struggle to find rest and joy in my ministry here. I know it sounds silly, but I had to work through feeling bad for being back in a city where everything I could possibly need or want was at my fingertips. I struggled with the fact that much of my daily life has been filled with building relationships by doing fun things and going out to eat, a lot. It was super humbling to be gently reminded of the Lord’s sovereign hand in my move to Jo’burg.
Philippians 2:13 became a constant place of surrender. “For it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” (deep sign of relief)

My God is soo good! I don’t think I can say that enough! It has been so sweet just doing daily life here with Him leading me. The Lord has been so faithful, and answering so many prayers in the lives of people I am building relationships with. I wish I could be more specific, but being in a huge city means that the majority of my friends have internet and I am probably friends with them on facebook. Just know He is working.
I will say that being in Jo’burg is a lot like being in Auburn with respect to lots of social time. I have my daily ministries, but most evenings and weekends are filled with spending time with an incredible group of friends from my church. This is such a blessing but as with anything good thing, it is also a place to become super comfortable and complacent. As I said earlier, I have less than 80 days here, and the last 30 days passed by in the blink of an eye. It really helps put things into perspective, knowing that the Lord has placed me here for a very short time, but with His very great purpose in mind. I am daily thankful for my amazing friends back in Auburn. Their current ministry and our past time together is an ever-present model of a group of friends striving to glorify the Lord with everything, including our sweet time together. It was always encouraging and challenging to spend time with them. The Lord has really been challenging me to go deeper with my friends here. To get deeper than surface level….I love it! God is at work, always! Pray that I will continue in everything with urgency!

Besides lots of hangout time, I am going through a Christian counseling program with Marlene, the head of the counseling center at my church. It is great getting to work along side here and learn from her. It is constant confirmation of what the Lord has called me to. I am getting more and more excited about starting my counseling classes in January.

I am still working with the group of HIV positive women on Fridays. They live in one of the townships called Tembisa. Some of the ladies from IMB have been working with the ladies, teaching them to make beads that are being sold in the states. It is always such an incredible time getting to work along side them making beads and then sharing Bible stories with them. Pray that the Lord would truly reveal himself to them. They have heard the gospel message many times, but the veil has not been removed. Pray for revelation and understanding that leads to sweet salvation.

(Some of the suppies to make the beads)

I am also working with the youth group at my church. Definitely not something I thought I would be doing, much less excited about it, but it has been so great getting to know and spend some time with the younger girls here. Our church has a Friday night event every week. It is such a great time to be intentional in the kid’s lives and a great substitute to anything else they might get into on any given Friday night. Pray that the Lord would use me in powerful ways with some of the girls. I would really like to start meeting with one of the girls one-on-one during the week. Pray that the Lord would make a way if this is His will, and pray that she would be willing and eager to meet with me.

This is documentaion of the night that Courtney tried to turn our apartment into a foam party! It has been so wonderful working along side Courtney and Dawn. I have been continually blessed to have such Godly women to work and live with. We have so much fun encouraging each other and praying with each other. We also do our fair share of dancing around the house to blaring music, and find excuses to laugh at most anything. It is immeasurably more than anything I could have asked for or imagined….praise God!

Oh how could I almost forget! My Dad is in South Africa!! It was so incredible picking him up at the airport earlier this week and getting to spend a little time with him. He is off in the province next door for the week doing some ground work for a future ministry opportunity with a friend, and then He will be back in Jo’burg on Friday. My South African friends want to have a proper Braai (grill out) for him and just hangout with him. It will be so good just to sit, talk, and just soak up his wisdom!

My Prayer:
"Give me understanding, and I will keep your law and obey it with all my heart. Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight. Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain. Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word."
Psalm 119:34-37


On one of our days off we went to a tiger reserve and played with three tigers all afternoon. It was absolutely a dream come true!

This is Alice, a Bengal tiger we walked about the park.


Meet Apollo, a massive Siberian tiger. I look nervous because we were told that he would be fine as long as he had his bottle, and then the guy goes and takes the bottle away from him!

No More My God, I Boast No More

So I have finally surrendered the idea that this blog is my own. As with every other area in my life, I must to come to this place to be fully dependent on the Lord. There have been so many emotions and stories, good and bad, that I have wanted to share with everyone.....that is who I am. The whole process of starting an update one day and then changing it ten times before actually publishing it was tiring and just plain frustrating. It was then that the Lord very gently reminded me that He desires to speak and give life and encouragement through me, including through my writing. He led me back to one of my favorite verses, 1 Peter 4:11:
"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves he should do it with the strength God provides so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory forever and ever. Amen."

Honestly, I could write pages about all of the changes that have taken place over the last two weeks. I don’t really know how to shorten the story so I will simply say that we ran into some security issues in Tessaoua that resulted being evacuated back to the capital, Niamey, after only 4 days. Back in Niamey, Auburn made it clear to me that if I wished to continue with my internship that I must relocate to a non-travel warning country.





I flew into Johannesburg, South Africa last Tuesday. I will be serving the remainder of my HandsOn term here in the city. Everything is different! I’ve moved from the poorest country in the world to a city that I have heard compared to New York or LA. I’ve been through culture shock all over again. I live in a flat with two other girls from my orientation, Courtney and Dawn. We are having an incredible time getting to know each other and doing ministry together.




This move has been hard in many different ways. As I have always said, “The Lord is sovereign and He is over all things.” I know that He has ordained the steps I am taking. This is He pleasing and perfect will……but do my thoughts line up with these truths? It has been a challenge to really rest and trust. God has taught me all over again to Trust. He called me to believe Isaiah 30:21 and Isaiah 42:16 back when I was getting ready to leave Niger, but I could read those verses and find no comfort if I didn’t trust Him to fulfill his promises. Even now He is constantly reminding me that I must trust in Him in EVERYTHING and showing me more and more what this looks like lived out.

Isaiah 26: 3-4
“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock.”

Isaiah 30:15
“This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.”

And finally Psalm 46:10
“Be still (cease striving), and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”

How refreshing it has been to come back to the basics (some of you will appreciate that I just broke out into song singing “The Bear Necessities”), to be reminded that God is God, and that is enough! How freeing and humbling to just sit in His presence and know that He will be exalted with or without me! How exciting to know with out a shadow of a doubt that He has moved me to Jo’burg to allow me to be a part of His eternal plan!


(Hanging out at Soccer City)


Right now my life in Johannesburg consists of going around and checking out the different ministry opportunities I have here. Praise God that there are so many! Both Courtney and Dawn have beautiful hearts for children and middle school age kids. The first two days I was here we spent time at an orphanage and at a school. If you know me at all then you might have guessed I was miserable. Ok miserable is a strong word, but I was definitely longing to be ministering to women in some form or fashion. Praise God for Friday!! Friday was the first time I have felt useful in a long time. I had the opportunity to work along side two other women that have started an AIDs support group for local women. They go every Friday and share a Bible story with the women and answer any questions they might have. It was incredible to sit and talk with these women in English about my Savior, and the grace and mercy that God has for them through faith in Jesus!

The girls and I are apart of Edenvale Baptist Church (http://www.ebcsa.org.za/). I am so thankful to be surrounded by such an incredible body of believers. I have missed Auburn so much! Another facet of our ministry here is to do outreach within our apartment complex and connect the people we meet with believers from our church. This is challenging because our neighbors pretty much keep to themselves. The girls and I are planning to pass out cookies this Saturday and invite our neighbors to a game night at our place on Tuesday. Some of our friends from church are very excited to be a part of this.

I am meeting with a lady named Marlene tomorrow. She is the director of the counseling facility that runs through our church. She is very excited about me working with her, and has already asked me if I would like to do some counseling under her. My first response was, “Woah, I don’t have a degree yet!” My dad very quickly challenged me to step out in faith and allow the Lord to stretch me and use me as He sees fit. All by His power!! We will see what exactly she has planned, but I am thrilled. This is my heart and what I know the Lord has called me to! God is soo good!

Isaiah 50:4
“The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being taught.”







From left to right: Stacie, my supervisor and "best facilitator in the world; Courtney, my fellow Alabamian who is sadly a bama fan (boo); Dawn, who is from Virginia; and myself!

The Way Everlasting

I think I have started this post three times over the last few days. It is overwhelming to think about all that has happened and all that I have learned in such a short time. I hope this continues to be a persistent problem.


These are the wonderful girls I have been living with for the past week. They are headed all over Africa: 2 to South Africa, 2 to Mali, 2 to Guinea, 2 to Kenya, and 4 to Senagal!


So orientation is finally over. Over the last 8 days I have been through sessions about culture shock, African worldview, sharing my faith with a Muslim, poverty issues, development, bargaining, animism, and Chronological Bible Storying (C2C). I attended an African Assembly of God church Sunday morning, and then worshiped with a random assortment of people at English church later that night. I have had my fair share of trips to the market practicing my bargaining skills. I am apparently a “beast” at this sport…..I wonder who I got my skills from? I played volleyball and added a few shades of purple to my ankle that matches my purple toenails! I held a hedgehog (so cute and scary all at the same time) and ate a burger and fries at the American Embassy.


Jess and I had an opportunity to do an overnight stay with an African family. Our trip started in the kitchen as we stuffed our faces with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, not knowing what we would be fed over the next 24 hours. We were welcomed to our temporary home by seven children. It was amazing to see how a family lives completely outside. Our bed was under a “roof” held up by four posts, while the rest of the beds were scattered around the yard. The kitchen was under a nearby tree, and the bathroom was a few feet past that. At night, the mosquito nets came down and we all fell asleep under the stars. I was called from my sleep around 5:30 by a goat bleating in my face. I was not a fan of this particular wake up call. Then came breakfast….an interesting blend of millet, fresh goat’s milk, and water. Sadly, we had to tell her that we could not eat it because she had mixed cold water in at the very end. All water that I drink for the next 4 months has to be boiled before use. This instance was the first time I was really faced with the challenges that result from the language barrier. The mother was highly offended that we would not/could not eat the food she had so tediously prepared for her guests. We tried so hard to apologize with words she could not understand. It broke our hearts to see her change in attitude towards us for the remainder of the time we were there. I am so thankful that I will not be thrown into my village with no knowledge of the language to communicate with! This experience truly was eye opening in so many ways.

The language barrier has really challenged me more than I ever imagined. How in the world can I adequately tell someone about my Savior and His everlasting love? How can I answer their questions about Jesus with only 3 weeks of language training? My words have always been something that the Lord has used to comfort and counsel, and now I have had that stripped from me. This was a really hard thing for me to come to grips with. How sweetly my Comforter and Counselor has reminded me of His desire to be glorified in my weakness! How quickly He has taken me back to the truth of His word:

“I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do: I will not forsake them.”
Isaiah 42:16

“Whether you turn to the right of to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way: walk in it.”
Isaiah 30:21

In a sense, I am completely blind with no direction and no ability, on my own, to get where I need to go. I knew that these 4 months would have to be completely lived out in surrender and dependence on His strength and provision. It is a constant process and I need frequent reminders. I praise God for His faithfulness and patience with me.


This is a picture of the Niger river taken as we were drving across the brigde. It has rained every day for the past week, so there has been lots of flooding.



Tomorrow at 4:30 am Jess and I will get on a bus and ride for 12 hours to Tessaoua. This will be my home until December. We will start 3 weeks of Hausa language lessons on Monday. I am very excited to begin to learn Hausawith the strength the Lord provides in order to minister to my village. On that note, we finally have a village to serve in. Gidan Gorga (house of Gorga) is a village about 15 minutes outside of the city. Our supervisors, Brittany and Rachel, have spoken to the chief a few times specifically telling him that there are two girls that would like to live in the village to teach them about Jesus. When they asked him if he knew who Jesus is, he simply responded, “Yes, He is the Son of God!” This is huge for a predominantly Muslim village!! Please continue to pray that my village would be receptive to the gospel. Pray for the chief’s salvation, so that he may be an oak of righteousness to his village.
We will visit the village sometime next week to meet our chief and see our hut that they have prepared for us! I know ya’ll are so excited to see pictures of this. I am told that we have a big yard, with a tree in one corner and our very own bathroom in the other corner (the hole is being dug as I write ha)!


Here are a few pictures from my orientation:



The African family and myself sitting on one of their beds…
If you look closely, you can see my bed in the top left corner.






This is Jess.....so thankful for her!



I held a hedgehog earlier this week….sorry dad, I just can’t listen when it comes to little creatures!

Steadfast Love

So I ignorantly assumed I was immune to the possibility of the beast we call jet lag.....I was wrong. After waking up at 2, I finally gave in around 3:30 and got up to read and write. I sit here with soo many things I want to tell you but after only 2 days the task seems daunting! If you will permit me to ramble I will try to put a few random tidbits into writing:

* Apparently my feet swell up like balloons after long flights.
* It is culturally inappropriate to cry. They recommend if I need a "good cry" to volunteer to cut onions. If you know me at all this makes you laugh because you are already hoping that I keep up with how many tons of onions I will end up cutting.
* Eye contact with a man basically says that I would like to go to bed with him. This. is going to be incredibly challenging to stop because I took a stinking class on. interpersonal relationships where I was graded on things like making good eye contact. Ha
* Niger is 97% Muslim and 0.7% Christian.....the first missionary came here in 1924.
* Yesterday(8-3-10) was Niger's Independence day.....go plant a tree!
* In Niger, the average annual income is $200.
* I just ate a massive spoonful of peanut butter. Their normal stuff is in between our creamy and chunky and I like it!
* Meat doesn't really exist at meal time....thank you dad for the wonderful jerky! It is keeping me sane!
* We had a Hausa pastor give us his testimony today and teach us how to present the gospel specifically to a muslim. It was the clearest presentation I think I have ever heard. Praise God for our depravity and His divinity!!
* Purple is my color for this trip. I don't know why but again, if you know me, you know that I have been an avid purple hater for quite some time (my whole life)!
* I cannot quit thanking God for giving me such an incredible girl to partner with. Jess and I are complements of each other in so many ways. We are both excited to see God's power displayed as our weaknesses and strengths work together! Basically she is pretty amazing! Such an answer to prayer!
* Ice is going to be way harder to give up than I thought. Thankfully I still have access to it now.
* Oh and it is incredibly hard to remember to use only filtered water for everything....sometimes I wonder when I am going to get the ice from the tray that one of the girls forgot to use filtered water!
* I was shocked to see huts and lean-tos everywhere on the side of the road right next to the airport. I am shocked because I am in the capital city, meaning the "richest" and "most developed." This makes me somewhat aware of what lies ahead of me as I travel further in country.
* Niger is now the most under developed country in the world, even under Iraq! It is also one of the poorest!

One of many things God has showed me about myself:
Having no expectations started to become code for low expectations. I didn't realize it, and thankfully the Lord was quick to show me, but fear had started to creep in. Fear of what? Well, a fear of failure, fear of inadequacy, and maybe just a fear of not seeing fruit for my labors. Such a selfish, me-focused outlook on my time here! I was quickly taken back to the verses that God used to plant, water, and confirm my calling to serve in Africa. They embody what I know He has brought me here to do. So instead of having no expectations, I am challenged to have supernatural expectations that require a supernatural power to accomplish the task at hand. How convenient that I should have the Holy Spirit living inside of me who has equipped me for ever good work. How perfect that my God does not need me to do his biding but chooses to use weak little me so that the world will see His majesty and stand in awe of my Creator and my Sustainer!!!

Isaiah 61 is my calling and this is my prayer:
"The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion-- to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit; that they may be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified. They shall build up the ancient ruins; they shall raise up the former devastations; they shall repair the ruined cities, the devastations of many generations."
Vs. 1-4

"Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy, to the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen."
Jude 24-25

And so it begins......

So my journey begins! I am officially in Africa now. After many sweet goodbyes and almost 2 days worth of traveling with very little sleep I am almost to Niger. I find myself laughing often at the craziness that is Africa. Having no expectations has taken on a whole new meaning including when and if we get to Niger in the next week ha! It is 3 am and we have just boarded our flight(6 hours late) that is hopefully taking us from Casablanca, Morocco to Niamey, Niger. I will be staying for a ten day orientation with 13 other girls, including my HandsOn partner Jess. I am already thanking God for His provision, because she is incredible. I am soo excited to see all that the Lord has in store for our ministry together in the village!
The peace that truly surpasses all understanding still rules in my heart! It is greater than all the uncertainties that face me because there is no unknown to my Savior. I am constantly reminded that He has ordained every step I am to take and that He is the one who provides the strength and power that I am walking in. What incredible freedom that gives me (2 Cor. 3:17)!! To God be ALL the glory!!

Here rests my heart:
"For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, with ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake. For God, who said, Let light shine out of darkness, has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us."
2 Corinthians 4:5-7

*Please pray that Jess and I would all be united in His Spirit to serve Him together.

*Ezekiel 11:19 - Pray for the hearts of the Hausa (pronounced house-ah) people that Jess and I will be living with.

Thank you all so much for your prayers! I am actually speechless when I think about how incredible the body of Christ has been to me! I love you all so much! The letters are marvelous....I'm sure they will make me cry but what's new?

Ash

"All my soul needs is all your love to cover me so all the world will see that I have nothing without you. Take my body, build it up. May it be broken as an offering of love for I have nothing without you. Take my time here on this earth, let it glorify all that you are worth for I have nothing without you."
-Bebo